Monday, April 6, 2009

Traveling soon with new GPS

Well this will be a crazy week. I am getting ready to travel to Washington DC to sit on the convened diversity advisory counsel (a privilege of the highest honor.)

As I have stated in my last postings, one of the duties of being disabled and working alongside the active duty and reserve is trying to adapt to the situation as much as possible. Thanks to a real Guardian, I was able to learn the metro public transportation system so that snickers (my Seeing Eye Dog) and I can travel from the hotel all the way to Coast Guard HQ without assistance. Now, I know this seems like a no brainer, but trying to travel in a city that you have not trained in before, and without using a cab (I like to do things myself if I can, can be a bit tricky. So, to prep myself for this latest trip, I have updated the GPS system I use.

Now, for those who have never heard of the GPS systems developed for the blind, there are a few out there. There is the Trekker (www.humanware.com), the Braillenote (www.humanware.com), the PacMate Street talk VIP (www.freedomscientific.com), and also Mobile Geo (www.codefactory.es) In that I wanted to slim down the amount of equipment that I need to carry I.E. Cell phone (a must if your blind), Laptop, Braille printer (you can’t take electronics into the Commandant’s situation room, so I will have to print out all my notes in Braille before I get there), plus all my personal gear and Snicker’s gear… You can see how I want to slim down a bit.

Now, I loved the Trekker system. It is basically a Dell PDA with a Bluetooth GPS receiver and an external speaker. A good system and I hope the person who bought mine gets many years of use out of it. However when I upgraded my cell phone, I bought the Mobile Speak Smart Phone and Mobile GEO which will make my cell phone do the same thing. This will cut down on the equipment that I need to bring as I will only need to carry the smart phone to get the GPS information.

Yes, I could use a cab, but there is something very good about traveling the same way at the same time and by the same means as all others in the group. Plus, I get to explain what the Auxiliary is and how a disabled person can serve in our nation’s uniform. The last time I was on the metro I had the chance to educate some Marines on the subject. We also talked about my time as an honorary Marine so looking back on those years was good as well.

Oh, the time when ASTC was showing me how to get from the hotel, he was supposed to hang back to make sure I could find the correct train and such. Well, I didn’t hear him back there so I believed him to be “shadowing me.” This is a method where the sighted person hangs back and gives the feedback if the blind person gets stuck. Kind of like a safety net. Well, I made it all the way to work and no ASTC. I was asked where he was and it turns out I left him somewhere between Lafunt and Pentagon city. Well, I guess I passed my check ride.

This time it’s all up to Snickers and me.

Well, that’s all for now, Semper Paratus, and check out those gps links.

Sparks.

Saturday, April 4, 2009

Researching our national past

Taking public transportation affords one time between walking the mile to the first bus stop taking the two hour trip to work (not counting changing the three buses), so you have time to keep yourself busy. As my Grandmother always said "You'll fight and die for Ireland” No, No not that quote, "Idle hands are the Devil’s work.” So, in keeping with the hope to better myself (as I said in my last post), I have started reading all of the historical documents related to the founding of our country. What is my finding? Wow, I think every American should read them!

Yes, there is the talk of oppression, teriney, and lack of adressment of grievances, but it also states that revelution is truly the last resort after trying all else in their power. That in itself is a powerful statement. My Father taught me “No one wants to go to war, least of all, the soldier.” (not sure where the quote is, but it stuck.)

I then started asking myself, “Sparks, how much do we really learn about our history?” The truth, not much. Ask most Americans what the first amendment protects, and most people will say Freedom of speech. However they may or may not know that it does not mean you can yell “Grenade!” in a crowded shopping mall. This is not to say that just because I have read some documents that I am now an expert, but it does mean that I am learning.

How can I claim to wish to defend a country when I haven’t learned all that I can about it? How can anyone?

Recently I again watched “The Wind that Shakes the Barley.” An extremely accurate depiction of the Irish Civil War and rebellion after the Easter Rising of 1916. I paused and realized that in many ways I know more of Irish history than American history. So, what does one do to correct a problem? Take the first step.

I also hope that this American research will help in my first year of law school. There is a good book “Law 101” that I am currently reading to help me on my way as well.

What does all this have to do with the Coast Guard, Ham Radio, or the pub? Well only to say that one cannot remain stationary but must continue to grow and move in a direction. That direction is a personal choice, but movement must be done.

Now the connection, Semper Paratus, 73, Slan go foil. There you go, I connected all the topics to this one message.

Sparks

Thursday, April 2, 2009

Careful what you wish for, what if you get it

Careful what you wish for, you just might get it.

I’ve spent all day thinking about my last posting, so I feel that I must follow it with this one. The saying goes, “careful what you wish for, and you just may get it.” What would happen if the disabled were let in themilitary or, if the Auxiliary was commissioned or enlisted?

Let us say that President Obama authorized the enlistment or commissioning of the disabled into the military. Cool right? Well, not without careful planning. Let us say that the Auxiliary was expected to be a full member of the reserve force, sounds good right? While it would be impossible for me to layout a full plan for every disabled person’s experience, or how every Auxiliarists could be enveloped, I must speak to how it could be for my direct experience.

First, this idea is something that I’ve been planning for ever since the age of ten. Basically started planning out how I would serve and what I would bring to the table. It started with boy scouts, progressing to the rank of Eagle Scout. I learned everything I could use about field survival, camping, but other skills such as citizenship in the community, state, nation, leadership, followership, project planning, and problem solving, and so on. Just making Eagle Scout has got to say something in the level of commitment I have shown to serving my country. But this isn’t enough, not by a long shot. But it is a start. Anyone who thinks you just sign up and then your set hasn't thought about the situation hard and long enough. As an example, I had someone who is disabled say "I'd go to the sandbox if they sent me." Well, what would you do, your blind what skills would you bring to the fight that they don't already have? I'm also blind so I can't shoot, I most likely would put my unit at risk as I can't see and may give away my position, so I know combat is not the way I could serve in the military. that being said combat is not the only way people in the military serve. yes it is what all train for, but few ever see it. Also, don't discount the fact that the pointy end of the speer needs a strong support shaft or, when it is plunged into the emeny for the kill, it will snap off. I am a part of that strong shaft. So, the first trick is to know that you have to serve in ways that are positive and add to the mission not take away from it. So, it is all about skill sets that is your first step.

Secondly, get your education, learn, learn, learn. I joined the Civil Air Patrol, and before joining, I looked at jobs (positions) where I could directly have a major impact. For my part, I knew that aircrew was out of the question, however, communications being a ham radio operator was a perfect fit. However it isn’t enough to operate a radio as any first day recruit can do that I have to become a subject matter expert. I had to become the “go to” guy on all things pertaining to communications. Not only that I have to learn as much as I can about the uniformed service which I served with. This meant taking ROTC (in college), reading books on leadership, military tactics, history, government politics, and basically, learn as much if not more than anyone else who wares that uniform. The only difference regarding my skill sets and education has to be my lack of sight.

So now that I have been in the Coast Guard Auxiliary, what happens now? Well, I have done much currently serving as a Communications watch stander both augmenting CAMSLANT as part of the AUXMON program, continuing my amateur radio education as a ARES operator, and my ICS, and NIMS education as well. When the crap hits the fan I have to have skills to offer that commanders can use. I also served as a public afairs officer and having a BA in mass communications makes it easy for me to talk to the media and deal with those types of tasks. Is that enough to give me the skill sets that the military can use? I hope so. Also, communications is not the only pie I have my finger into. I am currently serving on a diversity counsel where I am learning about diversity, working with all different types of people. I am also learning about how the different components work. The active duty is different than the reserve wich is different than the civil component wich is different than the Auxiliary. I must know where to go to find the regulations covering any topic or at least where to start, and who to ask. In short, I must completely emerce myself into the service and learn all that I can so if there is a question, I may have the answer. Like the Coast guardman's creed says "Bring my leaders solutions not problems." I am still working the plan.

I have currently applied to law school. Upon graduation I plan to apply to support the JAG corps. Why? Because it is a direct position the military will always need, something I can do without requiring that I be armed, thus freeing up others for armed roles.

That is the ticket. Yes I want to serve on active duty or in the reserves, but if that were to happen I have to have something to offer them. A warm body isn't enough as I can't just be any old foot soldier as I can't shoot. If anyone reading this has any thoughts about this being a whim, or that there is not a whole lot of thought being placed into this idea, they will see this isn’t the case.

If the disabled are going to be placed in the military, they have to have skills that can be put into action from day one. This means lawyers, medical professionals, counselors, religious leaders, and others who already have their skills. I do not see people starting out as e1, but rather a direct Officer or NCO program and that is only because the amount of training to bring them up to speed has to be very little to none needed. And, it is all about their skill set making them directly useful from the get go.

The uniformed services needs the help as they say there is a shortage of people. Well, if there was a way to use the talents of all who wish to serve, in a way that matches skills with mission effectiveness, then it could be a win, win situation.

The second part of this whole idea concerns where I could see the Coast Guard Auxiliary being in five or ten years.

First, the Auxiliary is there firstly to support the active duty and reserve Coast Guard. No more, but no less. Well, over the past seventy years this has been done, but how long will it continue?The other question is when it counts how can we best position our volunteer force to get the mission done? Are we supporting, training, and assigning the duties to best use the volunteer force?

1. Train from day one that all volunteers are members of the United States Coast guard. If they know this fact from day one they will always take that role first, and a volunteer second. Why is this important? Well, they will understand that when an assignment is accepted, it is a contract between the Coast guard and the volunteer and the Coast Guard expects that the volunteer will show up ready for the mission. Secondly the volunteer expects the Coast Guard to provide the tools the volunteer needs to carry out the mission. Anything less and we start out with a problem.
2. Training and equipment. The volunteer is giving their time and money, so they need to have the training for a task the Coast guard needs. And the Coast Guard needs to provide that training and equipment for the volunteer. You can’t expect a volunteer fire department to know how to fight fires on their first day, nore can a volunteer fire fighter expect they will be entering that house on their first day either. This is why training and meaningful assignments and a progression path are so importent. For the most part the Auxiliary is left to recruit, train, and equip itself. This works wonderful in many areas, and is completely lacking in others. For many Auxiliarists they go to flotilla meetings just passing the time completely cut off from the rest of the Coast Guard. Using myself as an example, when I noticed that my flotilla wasn’t providing the level of training I desired, I went above it to division and to district, and now to the active duty. Do you remember how I said it was the skills you bring to the Coast Guard they can use that makes you useful? Well, the volunteer must find those skills and continue to build upon them by having the chance to attend training right alongside their active duty and reserve ship mates as one team.
Why wouldn't you use someone to maximize them if they are working for you for at little to no cost? In order to use them, you must train them yorself don't expect the volunteers to train themselves unless you are sure the standards are being taught. We are moving in that direction with ICS and NIMS being made standard across the force so that is a step in the right direction

Equipment doesn’t just mean boats, life jackets, radios, but also support. This means job protection for volunteers that are assigned to duty. For example…

Auxiliarist Jones is needed to help with a major hurricane that struck the gulf coast. He goes to his employer and says “may I please go?” and the employer says “Yes, go forth and do good things.” Well, time passes and Mr. Jones is gone for two weeks. When he returns he finds he was fired from his job. Right now there is nothing currently protecting Auxiliarists from just such a story from taking place. But, you say they are volunteers, they don’t have to go. How can the American public or the rest of the Coast guard count on Auxiliarists if there is no real way of bringing the full weight of the volunteer force on to the mission? We may as well not get the Auxiliarist's hopes up of being used unless we really mean it.

Lastly, and this is important. Every force needs a structure and discipline.
The Auxiliary has a chain of leadership and management. This is a good start however its officers often do not have the training, or, leadership to guide the organization. This is through no fault of their own, but rather due to the nature of a voluntary force. No Auxiliarist can compel another Auxiliarist to do anything. Also, the active duty or reserve Coast Guard cannot order, direct, or force an Auxiliarist to do anything either. The worst that can happen is the person can be disenroled from the organization.

How can an Auxiliarist be held accountable when they really screw up, but also, if we turn the coin how can an Auxiliarist hold the rest of the Coast Guard accountable when they fail them and forget to see to the volunteer’s needs? If Auxiliarists were enlisted or warranted or commissioned into a true volunteer force, subject to commands, but fully supported, then true accountability across both sides could take place. If an Auxiliarist failed in their duty, they could be held accountable to that failure, but on the flip side the rest of the Coast Guard can be held accountable when it fails to completely use their volunteer force. No more could the Auxiliary be left out out just because it is easyer to forget they are there and trying to make themselves ready and make sure they had what they need. Anything less and I must ask the question, why have an Auxiliary if it isn’t going to be completely used?

There was a time where we had a tempary reserve made up of volunteers who were members of the military just as the paid ones. Why not bring that model back again?

I do wonder why that topic of a Temp Reserve is so taboo? What would happen if the idea was explored? How many people would sign up? How many more missions would get done? How much more effectively would a group of volunteers be if it functioned in that type of model? It worked inWorld War I, and the UK had such forces as well.

Sure I am fully aware it would have it's problems, but it goes back to skill sets. Sertain people would be invited to enrole into the Temp reserve if they had a sertain type of skill set an would be assigned to reserve units and so the Auxiliary wouldn't change, there would just be another option for those who wanted more than what the Auxiliary currently offers.

Anyway, here I go again ranting and raving online again. When will I learn?

I just hope all who read this understands that my heart is in the right place and that is to serve my country the best I can and that I have much more to offer and that there may be a better way out there

Sparks

Out of the Silence

Out of the Silence

Well, I don’t know how many people even know of my blog, or how many countless people visited only to find that it hasn’t been updated since October of last year. Well, recent events cause me to consider writing again.

1. Why did I stop writing? Well, it seams that I struck a chord with leaders and readers when I expressed my opinions. Not that they weren’t done with respect, and a true desire to convey ideas in a way that was well thought out and after much consideration on the subjects… No, it was brought to my attention that my postings gave many people pause, and may do more harm than good and that is a sad thing. It is sad that because I have the view that the disabled have a place in the military or that a uniformed volunteer should be fully supported, trained, equipped, and respected as anyone else that is serving their nation would start such a fire storm. So I went silent for a while.

2. So, then why do I post now? Well there have been events that I feel I should comment on. As someone who is considered to be at the forefront of “breaking the mold” as a good friend and ship mate used to say, it is my duty and responsibility to comment on these events, and to provide leadership and guidance on these subjects. I hope therefore that the people involved (although I will not give names) will read my comments and take them as friendly advice in hopes we can turn these actions into positive learning experiences.

First of all, I have always believed, that if you want to be treated, respected, and accepted as everyone else, you must adapt yourself just as they have. This means learning as much of the culture, having as much of the same education (this means subject matter rather than academic) education, and in general blend in. This is never more evident then my experiences of serving in uniform. The fact is, that most people don’t care about your disability, they don’t have time as the mission comes before all else. This doesn’t mean they won’t be cool about it, or help you when you really need it, but it does mean that you can’t run and show the ADA or REHAB act card when things don’t go your way. Do your duties the same way you would if on active duty. If you want to be treated like an active duty or reserve member, then act like it.

Secondly, don’t make yourself out to be someone your not. Say what you mean, and mean what you say. Remember that many people aren’t comfortable with someone in uniform who isn’t the picture of a recruiting poster. So, cut out the boosting of your record. I have never lied about what I have done either in or out of uniform. This has worked for me in situations where my actions were questioned. If you build up a reputation of being honest, and always trying to do your duty in good faith, then your honor and integrity will be without question. This means not saying you are on active duty, because after all, your not. This also means never claiming awards you didn’t earn. Where is the honor in that? Why would you want to be taken as a fool who doesn’t have enough guts to ware the few awards they truly earned? Even if you have none, when you are decorated it will mean so much more as you! And no one else earned that award. This doesn’t mean you can’t be proud of your uniformed service, as after all, you are disabled and serving your country, but when you build yourself up to be some Rambo type all you do is loose credit for yourself and all others who serve.

Thirdly I have heard and read comments from some who aren’t comfortable with trying to earn the same level of respect as those other uniformed members despite the fact that you may be volunteers and or disabled. When I hear someone say “We aren’t good enough, we haven’t gone to war.” Or “We are just Auxiliary”, or “we shouldn’t have this or that.” I am struck with a since of wonder. Why do people subjugate themselves? Why wouldn’t someone want to be thanked for serving as little or as much as everyone else? As a good friend put it, "A bill and four quarters have the same value, both different, but the same value." An Auxiliarist and active duty member have the same value, different, yet have the same value. The fact is that most people on active duty never see a round fired in anger, they will never see combat, and sadly to many and I have seen this growing up as a military brat and being around all services, there are many who see it as an easy way to keep a job. This is never to take away the service they give, and the commitments they make, God knows I would be right there with them if I could, but don't ever discount the commitment of volunteers either, it's a two way street. For the most part it is taken as such. Now, Why would I make such a point? Well, there are few who will understand what it means to have the desire to serve yet be told there is no place for you. I liken it to the blacks of World War II who were ready, able, and willing to give their talents, and if required their lives in defense of their country yet were made to serve as cooks and stewards. I have used that analogy and received critical comments from those who say “How dare you compare yourself to the blacks, they can see…” Well, I stand beside the belief that anyone who has the understanding and desire to serve can contribute something to the mission. Even if it is just answering the phone. Not to use that desire, or talent when the person has such a willingness to serve is an idea I can’t rap my hands around. No, I am not advocating that I as a blind man be a rescue swimmer, or a tank driver, as good judgment must always be used. But I stand behind the view that one can be matched with duties that maximize their abilities and give the unit the most positive use of them being there.

What does this come down to? We have two people that I know of that may need a little help. The first is unsure about if they rate the same respect as everyone else based upon their volunteer service, and the fact they are disabled. The second has had some errors in judgment such as making claims of being in the military, and awards they haven’t earned. The first will be helped with time, and experience. Once they get out into the fleet and find their way, they will learn that when it comes down to it, active duty or not, service is service and that all have honor and should be respected. They will have a chance just as everyone else to earn that respect. The second I have heard whispers that the person is to be slammed dunked under the stolen valor act. My question is what will that solve? Would it not be better to get to the root of the trouble and find out the reasons why this person is making such claims? If we can redirect their drive to a more positive direction, then we have gained the full force of their conviction. Now, I understand why the "act" is in place, and fully support it. However would we be using a shotgun to kill a house fly? Is there not more that could or should be done before such action is taken? Maybe the person doesn't know the harm they do, or has all the right heart and drive but the wrong direction to place these things in. Idel hands are the Devil's work as they say.

To close, I have never seen the tactic used “give them what they want.” Unless it is talking about the ways my leaders and mentors treat me. I have wanted to serve in the military from as long as I can remember, but being blind that is not possible at this time. I have always believed if given the chance that I would be a perfect fit. So, in that thinking I have always shaped my conduct to reflect that idea.In turn my leaders, and friends throughout the military treat me the same as they would any other ship mate. this means giving support where warrented, and stepping on my tail when required. Trust me, it helps and I have never felt so motovated, and never learned so quickly. So, for these two ship mates I would say, give them what they want, all the respect, but, all of the accountability as well. Call them on their claims and remind them that respect is earned not put on for show, have them show they have what it takes to ware that uniform with honor and pride, get to the heart of their actions and give them a chance to correct them. If they can not, then reeducate them, and if that still fails, don’t be afraid to have a “come to Jesus” meeting. Remind them their actions reflect the very uniform they claimed to love. I guess that is why I remained quiet for so long. I was making waves and didn’t want to bring discredit upon my uniform. But, all things considered, I feel it is right to say something in hopes the two Guardians I speak of can learn and hopefully be a positive and rise above these issues.

That is part of being a Guardian. I am one of the few Guardians who is disabled, so who better to understand if in part what they are on about. So, I am not being a Guardian to them if I didn't try to step in and provide a view point from one of their own.

Semper Paratus,

Sparks

Monday, October 6, 2008

Can you hear what I hear?

Hi all,


This weekend I took a trip down to Corpus christi, and sitting on the beach listening to the waves, birds, and the good old HH65 out of Sector, I grabbed the vx-7r off my belt and tuned around to see what was up. Aside from the normal ops and position reports, it was a good day. this got me thinking.

Being a ham radio type, and a Comms watch stander, it is normal for me to have some type of communications equipment on my person no matter where I am. Sometimes, I have been able to relay what I hear from my hand held to sector by phone as at the time for some reason; lac of line of sight, distence, traffic load, or what ever, the watch stander didn't hear it. This does not mean this is a practice that I would say that everyone do every time. I can say (having stood the watch at that control point) that it is very busy when you have your ear on many speakers at once.

This being what it is, you can never have enough people listening though, and, you may hear something that is lost in the shuffel.
So, when your at the beach, bring along your Marine VHF, a good practice to use when boating. Yu may learn something, keep in the know, and relay some traffic that is missed. As always, use your head as the watch stander is busy, but if you thik you heard something they should know, give them a call. Being extra ears on the Marie band and most of all Channel 16, is never a bad thing.


Take care, and keep your ear out.

Semper Paratus, and 73.

Sparks

Friday, October 3, 2008

Recruiting duty, the Irish way

So, as I said there could be just about anything on here, it’s a pub right?

Well, Me darling Katie fix a meal of cornbeaf, cabage, patatos, and I had to have that nectar of the Gods… GUINNESS!

This got me to thinking about one of my favorate pub songs. No, not the one called “dear boss” in which a man had to explane to their boss why they didn’t show up for weeks. No, it’s “Arther Macbride” in which describes recruiting in the old days.

Now, as an Honorary Marine (I’ll explane it another time), I was a recruiter. It wasn’t easy as people have so many miscomseptions about the military, and let’s not kid ourselves that all recruiters are honest and tell us everything about what we are getting into right???

Oh, something else you may find cool as I have a friend and fellow guardian who is also an Auxiliarist. He has CP (Cerebral Palsy
) and he is working as a coast guard recruiter. Another example of the progressive thinking of our service.
Well, the song goes like this and if you are a recruiter, at least you don’t have these issues.

“Me and me cousin one Arthrur MacBride
As we went a walkin down by the seaside
Now mark what followed and what did betide
For it being on Christmas morning

For recreation we went on a tramp
and we met Seargent Napper and Corporal Vamp
And a wee little drummer intending to camp
For the day being pleasant and charming

"Good morning! Good morning!," the seargent did cry.
"And the same to you gentlemen," we did reply.
For we meant them no harm, but we meant to pass by
It being on Christmas morning.

But says he, "my fine fellows, if you would enlist,
It's ten guineas in gold I would slip in your fist
and a crown in the bargain to kick up the dust
and drink the King's health in the morning.

"For a soldier he leads a very fine life
And he is always blessed with a charming young wife
And he pays all his debts without sorrow or strife
And always lives pleasant and charming.

"And a soldier he always is decent and clean
In the finest of clothing he's constantly seen,
While other poor fellows go dirty and mean
and sup on thin gruel in the morning."

But says Arthur, "I wouldn't be proud of your clothes
For you've only the lend of them as I suppose
And you dare not change them one night for you know
if you do you'll be flogged in the morning.

"And although that we are single and free
we take great delight in our own company
And we have no desire strange faces to see
Although that your offers are charming.

"And we have no desire to take your advance
All hazards and dangers we'll guard our own chance
And you would have no scrupples but to send us to France
Where we would be shot without warning

O now says the Seargent, "I'll have no such chat.
And I neither will take it from spouty nor brat.
For if you insult me with one other word
I'll cut off your heads in the morning."

And then Arthur and I we soon drew our hards
And scarce gave them time for to draw their own blades
When a trusty shellelaigh came over their heads.
And let them take that as fair warning.>
Their own rusty rapiers that hung by their side,
We flung them as far as we could in the tide
"Now take them out devils!," cried Arthur MacBride
"And temper the wretch in the morning."

And the wee little drummer, we flattened his pow
And made a football of his rowdy dow dow
threw it in the tide to rock and to roll
And bad it a tedious returning.

And having no money paid them off in cracks
And we paid no respect to the two bloody backs
But we lathered them there like a pair of wet sacks
And left them for dead in the morning.

And so to conclude and to finish disputes
we obligedly asked if they wanted recruits
We the lads who would give them hard clouts
and bid them look sharp in the morning.

Me and me cousin one Arthrur MacBride
As we went a walkin down by the seaside
Now mark what followed and what did betide
For it being on Christmas morning

We are on the air!!!

Hello all readers in cyber space,

I thought I'd take the plunge and start a blog. I hope you like the name as it combines some of my favorite things. Coast Guard, as I happen to be a Coast Guard Auxiliarist, Ham radio, and the pub (Grandmother Doyle would be proud).

Well, if you're still reading, you most likely also like one or more of those things as well. I hope to have topics ranging around those three things, so you never know where the pub will go on a given day.

I should also tell you I'm blind, and use a Seeing Eye dog who is pictured on the main page of the blog. His name is Snickers. I say this as these things may also come up around here.

So, I'll get behind the bar, pore myself a large pint of dark creamy Guinness, fire up my transceiver, and decode some navtext. I also may have to throw the ball, or take the credit card away from Snickers who loves to shop on petsmart.com.

Sparks